A Realization

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It’s officially been one week since I left Nicaragua. One week since I’ve heard the constant beauty of the Spanish language, since I walked the streets of broken and brave people finding joy in every moment, since I saw the Lord do the miraculous because hearts were willing and faith was flowing. One week since 150,000 people filled Plaza De La Fe in the heart of Managua to hear a Word that would change their nation forever.

In the last 7 days, my body, my mind, my relationships, and my heart have been in chaos, to the point where I felt like I was drowning.

It took me WAY too long to figure out what was going on. I almost allowed myself to get fooled into thinking it was just an off week, a symptom of jet lag, or a “random happenstance”. After my time in Nicaragua, I knew this couldn’t be the case.

It wasn’t until this morning, in a tear-filled conversation with my mentor, that it clicked. I was under spiritual attack. Wouldn’t it be great if I came back from this incredible trip, after our team kicked demons out of people, watched limbs heal in front of our eyes, felt tendons move at the name of Jesus, saw hope restored in someone’s heart, saw a nation change in a day, and forgot about it all in a sea of forgetful hopelessness? That’s how the enemy works: no new tricks. His main goal is always to have us get distracted, forgetful, and have us question: “Did God really say/do…?” Oldest trick in The Book.

So this is me, putting my foot down. I have a lettering next to my bed that reads “Be the kind of woman that when you wake up in the morning, the devil says, ‘Crap, she’s up!'” In the Bible it says that the devil is under our feet, that the war is won, I am more than a conqueror, and God is for me.

So, like the beautiful Nicaraguans I had the honor of being with for a week, I will choose joy, come what may. I will surrender. I will worship. I will pray. I will remember. I came back stronger, with new eyes and a new agenda. I will never forget what God did in Nicaragua this time last week. The people praising, singing, weeping, praying, overflowing with love, gratitude, and joy, even in the midst of sorrows and woes. A whole nation fell to it’s knees before God and declared hope, restoration, and strength in the name of Jesus, proclaiming a new and better future.

It is only just beginning, and I refuse to allow the attacks on my soul to pull me under. I am not drowning. Though a heavy storm may be about me, I will stay steadfast and keep my heart secured to the only One who can keep me afloat.

“This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast…” – Hebrews 6:19

I pray that this next week I walk with eyes wide open, ready and prepared for whatever lies ahead.

WEB Stadium 7


One thought on “A Realization

  1. Wow, such honesty and transparency! Isn’t so easy to rule out the fact that we’re most likely under a spiritual attack? And that our confusion & failures probably really have nothing to do with us. Thank you for your bravery!


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